INTERNET PRAYERS.

I am about to do something I said I would never do when I created this blog, and that thing is veering from the subject matter of Bolted Bionic Woman. This is a blog about my life, but only a sliver of that life as it relates to my spinal fusion and my recovery. I don't blog about my family, or what happens during my day, or my feelings, unless it is something that specifically relates to the reason for BBW's existence. But I am going to go back on my word, just this once.

Within the last couple of months, both Bolted Bionic dogs were diagnosed with mast cell tumors, a type of cancer that is common among the canine species, especially boxers and Boston Terriers. Diesel, our five-year-old boxer, was the first to be diagnosed by the family vet, and after being referred to a specialist, has undergone two surgeries to remove the tumor and has completed three of four rounds of chemotherapy. Two weeks ago I was crushed to learn from the specialist that he has another tumor behind his left ear. After giving his body some time to heal after the last round of chemotherapy, Bolted Bionic Husband and I will most likely have this new tumor removed and put him on a drug recently approved by the FDA to control existing mast cell tumors and prevent new ones.

But then, after having a new bump on her left shank biopsied, the vet confirmed that Greta, our seven-year-old chocolate Lab, has a mast cell tumor as well. We were stunned, as Labs are not on the list for Most Likely to Develop Mast Cell Tumors like Diesel is. She is being prepped for surgery to remove the tumor as I type this post. After the tumor is removed, the specialist (who has to be the kindest person I have encountered in quite some time) will confirm the grade of the tumor which then determines what type of post-operative treatment is needed.

Here's the thing: these dogs are our children, the closest thing to kids that Bolted Bionic Husband and I will ever have. There is no love like That Love that comes from nurturing another living being: ensuring they are well-fed, well-rested, healthy, clean, groomed, exercised, and happy. It creates a binding relationship built upon responsibility and accountability towards another; an agreement that states "I will take care of you no matter what;" a contract we often take for granted with dear friends and spouses, as well as people we don't even know who share the world with us. I take this bond with Diesel and Greta very seriously and would do anything to give them that happy doggy existence that carefully balances what I need from them (unconditional love and companionship) and what they need from me (quality of life and the freedom to be a dog, not an extension of my human self).

So I have a favor to ask. If you can spare a little time and energy from your already hectic and busy life, full of your own problems and sorrows and challenges; a life overflowing with doctor's appointments and soccer games and dances lessons and meetings with your boss and dinner to get on the table and bills to pay; would you please take a moment and send a good thought or prayer our way? It will be appreciated more than you know.

[Post-publication note: thank you, everyone, for your thoughts and prayers. Greta's surgery went very well and we pick her up today. A dear, dear friend of mine wrote me something so beautiful that I must share it here (I hope he does not mind): "No one can overestimate the power and influence of our life companions, and to equate our fellow creatures as family is to realize how much living things help one another. I believe that help extends beyond the face of this earth." Thank you again everyone.]

INSURANCE PAPERS: CAREFUL, HEAVY LIFTING REQUIRED.

My next post will focus on an aspect of spinal fusions I have not yet covered on BBW: the financial impact of this major surgery. If you do not have insurance, bless your heart. May God be good to you if you proceed with this surgery.

If you are fortunate enough to have good health coverage, bless your heart. Prepare to embrace your explanation of benefits statements (my stack is almost two inches thick now) and bills, as well as never-ending calls to physicians, physical therapists, health insurance companies, pharmacies, human resources leave of absence coordinators, bosses, disability insurance case managers, and your sister, with whom you commiserate on how dysfunctional these entities are while crying for the fourth time before noon. (Thank you, Moe, for being the best sounding board I could have ever asked for).

Stay tuned . . .

AN HONORABLE DISCHARGE.

I have been officially discharged from physical therapy, 30 weeks after the spinal fusion. It has been a wonderful experience made better by a knowledgeable physical therapy clinic and a fantastic Pilates instructor. Because of this, I have healed faster than I could have imagined, and I have learned new ways of moving and strengthening my body to prevent further damage to my spine.

During the last six weeks of PT I was doing 30-minute Pilates sessions with Shane, two to three times a week. One day, just to see what would happen, Shane had me do an hour session. Not only was I able to handle it, the hour went by in a flash. (I have determined that the reason I can commit to Pilates as a form of exercise is because one spends much of the time doing it while lying down. You just can't beat it). We decided that since my insurance was only willing to pay for two more physical therapy sessions, we would do two more half-hour sessions, register me as a private client, and move forward with one-hour sessions that I will pay for out-of-pocket.

I cannot give a full account of my Pilates sessions and how central they have been to my recovery without throwing in some information about Shane, Pilates Instructor Extraordinaire. At 28, Shane is a certified Pilates instructor - she can do the splits on a reformer that will make your jaw drop. Before becoming an instructor, she was a Vegas showgirl in some of the classic Vegas productions. Growing up as a dancer with a degree in dance performance, she has those long, lean lines you usual see on a dancer's body, but she is strong. Behind those lean muscles are some serious fire power! She runs or swims or cycles everyday and to me embodies everything that is looking and feeling fit. When I die, I want to come back with her body. Bolted Bionic Husband would like that too.

Beside being a knowledgeable instructor, Shane has a warm, inviting personality and the ability to motivate you in a way that works for you. I always look forward to class and never get that "I don't want to go" feeling. Since working with her my legs have become incredibly strong and I see muscle where there was none before. My arms are stronger and have taken shape. My tushy actually has some lift (after years of buying the same brand of jeans, I had to buy a different brand this year that would accommodate a more "pronounced" booty). And my abdominal core is stronger and has some definition - I have noticed the muscles engaging and protecting my back during the most basic of movements, and I often feel as if I am wearing a protective corset that supports my body and my posture.

So when my physical therapy sessions had to come to an end (thanks Bolted Bionic Health Insurance Company!), it was an easy decision to continue to do Pilates with Shane, even if it is an out-of-pocket expense at a time when money is tight. I look at it as a continued investment in a body that can now be monetarily valued at more than $150,000. But the value of feeling strong and living without pain? Priceless.

SEVEN MONTHS POST-OP.

The picture on the top is of the fusion incisions one week after surgery, while the picture on the bottom is how they look after seven months. The scar left by the drainage tube has really minimized, and the lengths of the scars have decreased. The pinkness is starting to fade and the scar tissue has increased.

All in all, they don't look so bad. They are obviously healing and that is a wonderful thing. I can still feel outlines of the hardware underneath, and occasionally I cannot feel the skin between the incisions being touched. Must be a nerve issue. But folks, they're getting better and that's a good sign!